A lot has been said and philosophized about this particular topic-honesty. But suffice to say that a lot people are still a long way from adopting an honest lifestyle. The truth about the imperfection of man, lays the foundation for honesty. Accepting this fact will be the first step most people need to adopt this virtue. Honesty creates an atmosphere that stimulates trust, believe and confidence.
To start living honestly, we must
Identify who we lie to, and the reasons we lie to them
We lie to our peers we think are better than us. We always want to look good in the eyes of others and we don’t want them to look down on us or think that we are less confident of ourselves. We want them to respect us. But here’s the shocker: lying to someone the first time is disrespect in the long run. People will admire you most for being your real self in their presence.
Lies to avoid embarrassment- perhaps you have done something not right and saying the truth about it might make others make jest of you, so you cover up your actions with lies to save your face from the embarrassment. But it is advisable to say the truth about it that moment, than having to make all manner of explanations when the truth eventually surfaces, by then, you would have dented your image. In his book “Think Big” (p.152) Ben Carson said,” if we live by the rule of honesty and accept our problems, we can go far down the road of achievement”.
Lies to authority, our parents, guardians to avoid embarrassment and punishment, including ourselves. When we've done something we feel guilty about, lies are told to eliminate the guilt, avoid the punishments, and get back to the objectionable behavior we're forced to lie about. It's a vicious cycle.
Anticipate behaviors that will make you feel guilty and likely lead to dishonesty
To end the cycle of embarrassment and lying, it's important to learn to anticipate things that you'll likely feel guilty about in the future, and avoid those behaviors. They could also be bad habits. When you lie, you're covering up some uncomfortable truth that's more easily couched in a lie. You can either get comfortable with the truth, or abandon the habit that makes you embarrassed. Then you won’t have to tell lies about it anymore.
Stop comparing yourself with others
Stop comparing yourself to others. Sometimes we lie to make ourselves seem bigger and better than who we really are, that’s because we're constantly competing and comparing ourselves to others, we easily cover up any inadequacies with a quick and creative lie. If you stop feeling competitive with others and give yourself the value you deserve, you won't feel the need to lie to bring yourself up.
Learn to have an open mind. Forget what you think other people want to hear from you and give them benefit of the doubt, assume that they're not being manipulative. Speak without feeling intimidated and tell the truth, without even the slightest bit of concern about whether or not it will make you look "bad." People respect honesty, even when the truth is uncomfortable.
Decide to own up to the consequences.
It’s understandable that telling the truth can lead to dire consequences but it's better to own up to lies, to deceits, and to prior behaviors that you're embarrassed about, rather than continue to build a complicated nest of lies. Although it can be exhilarating and scary to come clean and there might be some form repercussion at the end of the admission but it'll be the honest consequences that you deserve.
Do things you take pride in!
This way it’s much easier to feel good about yourself and not indulge in lies.